Rules for Sharing

Write the question on paper and refer to it before you share.

1. Sharing is personal. We share who we are as individuals and as partners in our marriage relationship.

2. Sharing is specific to the topic. We share our attitudes and feelings stimulated by the presentation or sharing question.

3. Sharing is brief. Do not ramble on. State the situation and how you feel about it with as few words as possible.

4. Sharing requires mutual consent. We do not share negative feelings and attitudes unless we have already shared it with each other and we both agree to share it with the group.

5. Sharing is not discussion, nor is it meant to solicit a response or initiate a debate.

6. Sharing is not done on a soap box. We do not share to get a point across. Avoid preaching.

7. Sharing is in the first person (I feel, I think). We should not speak for our spouse (You feel, We think, etc.).

8. Sharing is directed to your spouse. The group is there only to witness your coupleness.

9. Sharing is unqualified. Please resist the temptation to judge another's sharing or to give unsolicited advice. Remember that just as feelings are neither right nor wrong, what we share is neither right nor wrong.

10. Sharing is confidential. Nothing shared in this setting is to be discussed outside the group.